I'm supposed to be doing school work, but I'm feeling pretty fried already, so I'm going to take a break to post a new update. :)
Pirate wedding complete! Alan & I are officially married, in a raucous party we celebrated the night with friends and family, dancing with each other and our loved ones. I'm so relieved to be done with the wedding and super psyched to get pictures and video back! And once I have those, I promise to post pictures, but I'll at least post this one:
Here we are during our first dance, belting out the words to "Starlight" as we couldn't stop smiling at each other. <3 (Many thanks to Laura for this pic!)
And now we begin our new, combined save file. ;)
So is it different? Not yet, but I'm sure it will be. Of course, anytime I say that, Alan insists it won't be since we lived together so long, but I remember things from last time. And of course if I say that, he insists he's not the same as X. And of course he's not, I wouldn't have married him if he was! Jeez! But that only means that the change will be different too, better I'm willing to bet. And I could never place my finger on it before anyways, so I don't really have a good explanation anyways.
But this new part of our life has come with some of it's own growing pains already. One of which was the transition to living in our house alone again, having asked our roommate to move out. I think it was a lot of hurt feelings and miscommunication, and I think it all got sorted out eventually, but it wasn't an easy choice for us. I've always preferred having more people in the house. I've never been sure why. Alan & I began seeing a couple's counselor a few months ago, and she expressed concern about our home and said we need to focus on building us and our home as a couple and preparing for the steps we plan to take in the next few years.
And perhaps that's a thing X and I never really did. There were oh-so-many plans and ideas for our future, but we never truly made any groundwork. Even the fact that we moved every year seemed indicative of our future. Never happy where we settled. We had plans to move across the country so "settling down" didn't seem a good idea yet, but we never really.... established a feeling of home, of togetherness.
I've begun my Master's program (with assistantship, WOOOOO!!!), but the program is a 30-45 min drive each way. It's not terrible, no worse than the commute when I live in Cinci, but every day when I am driving home I can't wait to get here. We've created a space that feels good to come back to and feels like it is truly ours. We've spent the time, we've done the work, we've taken the hard choices and taken some shit for it, but we've built this space, this home, this castle that truly has helped us to build the sturdy foundations for our future together, our new family and our future endeavors. I am ready for whatever comes because we are solid.